Friday, July 20, 2012

Ahn Says 'Buy My Book and I'll Run for President'

Fiction or non-fiction?
Indecisive ROK-tease 50 year-old Ahn Cheol-soo has launched a book with a novel marketing strategy, saying that if people show they agree with him by buying the book he will have no choice but to push ahead with his possible plans to run for president and save the country.

Sources in the literary world said the move was "inspired", and thought it might represent a new opportunity for authors. For example, a doctor who had just written a book could say that he wasn't going to save a patient unless people purchased a certain number of copies of the work, on the basis that this was a vote of confidence in his skills.

But the book has left some confused, and not only over whether it should be classed as fiction or non-fiction. "Is he a politician trying to sell books to run for office, or is he an author trying to run for office to sell books?" asked 34 year-old Kim in a bookstore.

The book strongly hints at Ahn's presidential ambitions but does not arrive at a decision. Originally titled "If I did it", but launched as "Ahn Cheol-soo's Thoughts" (안철수의 생각), the book is written in the form of an interview with himself. According to the country's largest bookstore in central Seoul, where people's votes actually matter, the book sold 7,500 copies yesterday, setting a new record for first-day sales. The number is more than double that of the 3,500 copies sold for the Korean translation of "Steve Jobs", the other celebrity known to have a reality distortion field.

Ahn says that "The book is the first step in telling people about what I think about politics and plan to do". 'Step zero' was his lecture tour, in which he told people about politics and what he planned to do, and 'step minus one' was his courting of the media, in which he gave a series of interviews to tell people about politics and what he planned to do. Many who have experienced step zero and step minus one said they listened to his views and found his plans utterly convincing at the time, but none were able to explain what the actual policy proposals were afterwards.

Previously, former doctor Ahn rose to fame with his Korean anti-virus business before extending his comedy career to appear in NBC's Community and The Hangover series of movies under a stage name.

Last week, a massive public demonstration against Ahn standing took place in Seoul. Many who attended this 'million man march' - nobody bothered counting the women - said they were tired of politicians and prospective politicians playing politics and wanted honesty and decisiveness in government. But Ahn said the demonstration was classic over-compensation from a large group of voters who hadn't publicly come out in his favor because they hadn't yet accepted their true political orientation, and he thanked them for their support.

Important health note: Stress and nervous tension are now serious social problems in all parts of the Korean world and it is in order that this situation should not be in any way exacerbated that the following facts will now be revealed in advance: Ahn Cheol-soo will stand for president, and the deadly nuclear missile attack to be launched next year by an ancient enemy will result in the bruising of somebody's upper arm. In order that some sense of mystery should still be preserved no revelation will yet be made concerning whose upper arm will be bruised.

Related Links
Ahn Cheol-soo's New Book Hints at Presidential Ambitions
Local readers react to Ahn Cheol-soo's new book
Tantalizing contender
Penn & Teller: Bullshit!
Jedi Mind Trick
Reality distortion field
Is Ahn Cheol-soo a mirage?
Who is Ahn Cheol-soo?
Ahn Promises Almost Certainly Decisive Presidency
Exclusive: Ahn Cheol-soo to Announce Presidential Run During Ides of March
Ahn Chul-soo’s political plans still unknown
Ahn to release book to publicize his presidential bid

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