Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Simulated Attack on Yeonpyeong Island a "Great Success"

The simulated attack on Yeonpyeong Island which took place last week has been described as a "great success" by government sources. The simulated attack was organized to commemorate the one-year anniversary of the real attack which was conducted by North Korean military forces, although the left-wing Hankyoreh newspaper - which investigated the incident as part of its "Yeongpyeong Island Mystery" series - ultimately concluded that "freak hailstones" were the most likely explanation.

During the simulated attack, fighter jets and attack helicopters flew low over the island, and traumatized residents were asked to imagine themselves fleeing for their lives as they had done in reality a year earlier, while the noise of explosions and screams were played over the island's public address system. The government said it may provide simulated trauma counselors to help residents get over any simulated relapses caused by post-traumatic stress disorder, or at least doctors pretending to be "more prudent and thoughtful".

South Korean artillery responded to the North Korean provocation, simulating a retaliation that once again devastated large areas of seawater off the South Korean coast. The military said that during the simulation none of its K9 artillery suffered simulated malfunctions, although several actual problems prevented most of the units from participating in the simulation.

But it has been revealed that the exercise was almost called off five minutes after it began, when an over-enthusiastic artillery officer launched a simulated counterattack against the simulated North Korean forces without waiting for the dummy government to first phone the North Koreans to ask if they had a simulated explanation for attacking. The queuing system employed by the North Korean regime's call center typically involves at least 20 minute waits, although a callback option is available.

While the simulated attack is now over, residents have been asked to continue the exercise by applying for simulated compensation payments to cover the simulated losses they suffered. The government say they hope to complete this phase of the exercise by 2017.

Related Links
Military drill marks anniversary of Yeonpyeong attack
Compensation for residents to drag on
Yeonpyeong gearing up for recovery but scars linger
North Korea shells South in fiercest attack in decades
Hankyoreh Hani TV - Cheonan Warship Mystery Video
China Urged to Return To Negotiating Table After Attack
Fearing Arrest, Chinese Foreign Minister Cancels South Korea Trip

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