Finally, the government took a position. "We will review all legal merits and, based on that, make a state decision." said another spokesman for the Ministry of War and Japanese Affairs. But experts immediately warned that it was far from clear under Korean law whether Noda had engaged in a criminal act by sending the letter, apparently disappointing senior figures in the Blue House who were hoping to take it to a plenary session of the United Nations Security Council as a justification for war.
The options reportedly being considered if legal experts conclude that the letter is not an act of war, are sending the letter back pretending that South Korea has moved and it is therefore not deliverable, denying having received it, or simply ignoring it.
Ministers were said to have initially favored the first approach, believing that it would be entirely plausible for South Korea to move given its location in a rather undesirable part of the world between China, Japan and North Korea, not to mention – if truth were told – the really awful atmospheric climate of the area, which contrary to popular belief in the region, is not only caused by Korean politicians.
But the Ministry of Really Korean Territories warned that pretending to have moved to a location just off the Californian coast – a secretly long-held aspiration – would weaken South Korea's territorial claims which are largely based on proximity to other Korean territories. Move the fatherland, they argued, and it would break the chain of claims which stretch from Jeju and Ieodo islands, all the way down to Australia – or Hojudo, as it should properly be called.
The dispute between Korea and Japan over the Korean Dokdo islets reached a boiling point after Lee Myung-bak made his first and last visit to the Korean island on August 10th. Japan said it would take Korea to the International Court of Justice, but the Foreign Ministry refused to be pressured by the legals threats because, it said, "Dokdo is clearly part of Korean territory historically, geographically, legally, academically, commercially, mathematically, meteorologically, ecologically, demographically, physically, spiritually, morally, visibly, logically, geologically, scatalogically and futurologically so no territorial dispute exists and therefore this conversation logically never happened."
Korea has been effectively controlling the Dokdo Islands since officially landing military-trained forces there dressed as paramilitary police in 1954. Before Japanese threats and American aerial bombing forced South Korea to resort to building a barracks on the island, Dokdo's Korean residents lived in peace and harmony with nature while offering a friendly welcome to the crews of all passing ships except those from Japan, China and the United States. The civilian population has since grown to over 134,000 Koreans, with no Japanese residents, making Japan's dubious territorial claim nothing short of bizarre.
Shortly after the necessary invasion of police personnel onto Dokdo, the Dokdo Miracle was discovered – a large rock jutting out of the island was discovered with the naturally formed words "Dokdo" on the front, and "Republic of Korea" on the back, apparently indicating that by some unknown sentient geological process, even the islands themselves knew where they belonged.
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